Frozen Secrets-Chapter 12

Milkpaw woke up feeling as if she hadn’t slept at all. Her body felt heavy as if it were made of stone and her eyelids threatened to droop whenever she tried to force her eyes open. The young apprentice was sure that she looked as much of a mess as she felt. Milkpaw hadn’t even bothered to groom herself the evening before leading to her fur drying up oddly and sticking up from the rainwater and mud caked her toes with a few streaks on her pelt. Someone should have woken me up by now. She thought, closing her eyes at the sudden throbbing in her head.

“Milkpaw?”

The cream she-cat opened one eye to face the one who had called her. She was greeted with the sight of Darkpaw leaning against the den’s rocky entrance.

The black tom had been rolling a small pebble with his paw when he had noticed his friend beginning to stir.

“Hey, Darkpaw,” Milkpaw replied with a sigh.

“It’s already sunhigh so I came to check on you-” He was cut off by Milkpaw’s startled gasp.

“Sunhigh already?” Milkpaw immediately shot up from her nest. “I have training with Badgernight and-” She cut herself off as Darkpaw raised his tail, signaling her to keep quiet.

“Don’t worry, Milkpaw,” He said. “Badgernight decided to give you the day off to relax. There’s nothing for you to do today.”

Milkpaw breathed a sigh of relief and laid her head on her paws again.

Darkpaw stood up and wove his way around the various nests dotting the rocky ground. “So, do you wanna get something to eat?” he asked, sitting in front of Milkpaw’s nest.

“I don’t really feel like it.” Milkpaw replied, looking up at him from her position lying down. “My head hurts.”

“You’ll feel better after you eat something.” Darkpaw urged, nudging the she-cat’s shoulder gently with a paw.

Milkpaw swatted his paw away before shifting around so that her back was facing Darkpaw instead. “Go away, Darkpaw.” She murmured. “I don’t want to be bothered right now.”

Darkpaw remained unfazed by his friend’s behavior. “Milkpaw,” he said softly. “You need to get out of your nest and eat something. You also need to get yourself cleaned up. Staying hungry and dirty isn’t going to do you any good.”

“Alright.” Milkpaw replied, too emotionally drained to argue. She slowly stood and walked past Darkpaw.

The tom caught up with her quickly. He gave her a small, bright smile while he walked beside her.

Milkpaw glanced at him before turning her attention to the path in front of her. They had exited the rock wall that lead to the apprentices’ den and were now walking toward the fresh-kill pile in the middle of the camp. Darkpaw acts weirder and weirder around me every day. She thought but decided not to ponder on it any longer. Instead, her mind began to wander to other things. I wonder what Birchpaw’s doing right now.

At the thought of her best friend, Milkpaw felt a pang go through her chest. It was a mix of sorrow, regret and anger. I just wish things would go back to the way they were before- when Birchpaw and I would share secrets… and when Orangepetal was still alive. With this thought, Milkpaw swallowed. She couldn’t help but wonder if it was really her fault her mother was dead.

Birchpaw’s accusation rang through her head. If you weren’t so weak, you could’ve helped Orangepetal. Now she’s dead.  Milkpaw just wanted to curl into a ball and whimper. I’m sorry. She thought. I’m sorry, Orangepetal.

“Milkpaw?” Darkpaw asked beside her, concern shining in his eyes. “Are you okay?”

The cream she-cat wanted to tell him that she wasn’t okay. She wanted to let out all her pent up frustration and emotions. Instead, she just gave Darkpaw a slight nod and realizing that she had stopped in the middle of the clearing, resumed walking to the fresh-kill pile.

Absentmindedly, Milkpaw picked out a small mouse at the top of the pile. She didn’t realize that Darkpaw was staring intently at her until he spoke again.

“You’re thinking… about what happened aren’t you?” he asked hesitantly.

Milkpaw didn’t reply but opted to take a half-hearted nibble out of her mouse instead.

The tom inhaled sharply. “Milkpaw, answer me.”

“So what if I am?” she snapped, amber eyes flaring.

“I’m-”

“Sorry?” Milkpaw accused harshly, standing up so that her face was only inches away from Darkpaw’s. “Saying ‘sorry’ doesn’t fix anything!”

“Like our mother being dead, for instance.” Interrupted a cold voice behind them.

Milkpaw’s eyes widened slightly for a fraction of a second. Birchpaw.

“B-birchpaw,” Milkpaw’s voice faltered slightly before turning cold. “What do you want?”

“Oh, nothing.” Birchpaw replied offhandedly as she began to dig through the fresh-kill pile. “Only my mother back.” She added coolly as she looked over her shoulder before picking up the squirrel she selected and trotted away.

After Birchpaw was out of sight, Milkpaw let out a low growl. “I’m going for a walk.”

“You can always talk to me, Milkpaw.” Darkpaw murmured, following the she-cat.

Milkpaw glanced at him but didn’t reply as they exited the camp.


Birchpaw licked her lips before burying the remains of her squirrel. Standing up, she arched her back in a stretch until the tip of her tail touched her spine. Afterwards she swept her gaze around the camp and watched her Clanmates milling about. Birchpaw swished her tail, sadness bubbling up inside her. It’s only been one night and yet it’s as if everyone’s forgotten Orangepetal already. Her sadness was soon replaced by confusion. Why is everyone acting as if nothing’s happened?

“Birchpaw,”

The apprentice’s ears twitched at the sound of her name and she turned around to see Cloudedstar sitting beside her. Birchpaw’s eyes widened at the state the Clan leader was in. I heard Cloudedstar was recovering, but I didn’t think she’d look this bad. She thought.

Cloudedstar’s gray-white coat looked ragged. She looked thinner and her shoulders slumped while she sat. The only thing that remained the same was the fire that lit up her amber orbs.

“Birchpaw,” Cloudedstar repeated. “You shouldn’t be sitting around and moping. I know you just lost your mother, but sulking about it won’t help.”

The apprentice opened her mouth to protest, but Cloudedstar silenced her with a flick of her tail. “I know how hard it is,” she said, slight sadness creeping into her voice. “To lose someone you care about. You feel hollow and it’s as if life isn’t worth living anymore.” Her voice dropped into hardly more than a whisper toward the end of the sentence.

Does she mean Badgernight when she was referring to someone she cared about? Birchpaw thought, frowning at the memory of witnessing Cloudedstar and Badgernight arguing by the lakeside.

“Put this into consideration, Birchpaw. Do you really think it would make Orangepetal happy to see you miserable like this?” Cloudedstar asked, facing Birchpaw.

“Are you suggesting I forget about Orangepetal?” Birchpaw responded incredulously.

Cloudedstar shook her head. “Of course not. I’m just reminding you that in order to have a future, you must let go of the past. However, that doesn’t mean you have to forget.” She replied before walking away.

Birchpaw continued to sit, deep in thought. I know a lot of cats from the other Clans who think Cloudedstar is unfit to lead because she’s really young and prone to immaturity. But she’s actually pretty wise. I guess she just chooses not to show it.


Milkpaw and Darkpaw walked together in silence.

Darkpaw eyed the she-cat beside him, unsure whether to break the silence or not. Milkpaw can be easy to read when she wants to be but there are also times where she just locks away her emotions. He noticed that the trees were starting to thin out and they were heading toward the moor.

Picking a spot underneath a tree at the edge of the forest before the moor gave way; Milkpaw sat down and leaned against the trunk.

Darkpaw copied her after she sat.

The she-cat stared ahead, amber eyes unreadable and her expression blank.

“So,” Darkpaw began, as he scuffed the grass with a paw and watched as the blades swished underneath.

“Darkpaw, do you think I’m weak?” Milkpaw asked suddenly, turning around to face him.

“Of course I don’t.” Darkpaw replied seriously though there was a hint of mild surprise in his voice while he looked up to meet her gaze. “You’re one of the bravest, strongest cats I know.”

Milkpaw gave him a watery smile. “You really mean that?” she asked softly.

“Yes.” Darkpaw replied quietly. His gaze then travelled over the WindClan border and onto the large moor beyond it.

A comfortable silence hung over the pair as they sat, relishing in the presence the other provided.

“I like staying away from the forest sometimes.” Milkpaw said suddenly. “Being close to the moor makes me feel as if there isn’t anything blocking my path. I just feel so free.”

Darkpaw nodded before noting that the sun was starting to set. “Wow, sunset already.” He murmured.

“Do you want to go back to camp already?” Milkpaw asked, turning her head to face him.

The black tom shook his head. “Not if you don’t want to go back yet.” He replied.

Milkpaw gave him a small smile before turning to face the setting sun again. “Well, maybe we can stay for just a little bit more.” She murmured.

Darkpaw felt a smile tugging on the corners of his lips at the sight of Milkpaw’s happy look. It’s nice to see her smiling again. He thought, content.

Milkpaw’s amber gaze was taking in the sunset before she noticed something gray flickering across the moor. Narrowing her eyes, she dug her claws into the ground when she realized what it was. Why does he always show up to ruin things? Milkpaw thought. “Darkpaw,” she called, eyes still on the gray figure. “I think we should go back now.”

“Okay then.” Darkpaw replied, standing up. “Let’s go.”

Milkpaw stood and nodded at Darkpaw. “Let’s go.” She repeated.

The two apprentices headed back to the forested part of the territory. The light of the setting sun cast an orange and mild yellow glow on the leaves and trunks of the trees as well as the undergrowth, making it look as if a fire was hovering close to the surroundings.

Milkpaw walked behind Darkpaw, thoughts about the gray figure across the moor gone from her mind as she enjoyed the ambience being created by the light. A rustling in the grass made her ears twitch but she continued to walk forward.

“Meet me by the border at moonhigh.” A voice called out softly.

The cream she-cat quickened her pace. She didn’t need to look back to know that voice was unmistakably Boulderpaw’s.


“Do you want to visit the nursery?” Owlspots asked, approaching Birchpaw when he noticed her sitting alone outside the apprentices’ den when he returned from hunting. “We can go visit the new kits.”

The she-cat stared at her paws as she pondered Owlspot’s question. “I don’t see why not.” Birchpaw replied with a shrug. In truth, she had just been wondering what to do since her mentor, Shadespark, decided to let her rest from duties that day. Standing up, Birchpaw gave Owlspots a nod before the two began their walk to the nursery.

“How do you think the new kits are doing?” Birchpaw asked.

“The rogue kits? Well, I heard they’re pretty energetic.” Owlspots replied.

Upon reaching the den’s entrance, Owlspots parted the curtain of vines and leaves covering the entrance with his tail by sweeping it to one side.

“After you.” He said politely.

Nodding her thanks, Birchpaw entered the den. “Thank you.” She replied.

The nursery was quite dim with patches of sunlight leaking through the gaps in the leaf-woven walls. It was cool and slightly breezy with a milky scent lingering in the air.

Sunnycloud was asleep in the far corner of one side. The pale golden she-cat had her back facing the entrance and her head was turned to the wall while her tail curled over her legs. She was sleeping soundly despite her kits play-fighting nearby.

Birchpaw stood by the den’s entrance and watched the kits playing with an amused smile on her face.

Scarletkit crouched low to the ground while she moved her head from side to side, looking for her littermates.

Huntkit sneaked behind her sister, safe from Scarletkit’s searching eyes. Wiggling her hindquarters, the golden she-kit pounced onto her sister’s back with a loud squeal.

As the two rolled about on the ground, Wolfkit began barreling toward them before ramming into them and sitting on top of his sisters. “Got you!” he crowed.

Without warning, Pebblekit struck from the shadows of the nursery with a leap. She landed on Wolfkit’s back, causing him to topple off Scarletkit and Huntkit. The gray tabby then began to paw at her brother’s ears.

Huntkit looked up from her place on the ground and grinned upon spotting Birchpaw and Owlspots standing by. “Did you come to play with us?” she asked enthusiastically as she stood up.

“Yes.” Owspots replied.

Birchpaw’s eyes roamed the den. “Where are Lightningkit and Fogkit?” she asked.

Pebblekit flicked her tail in the direction of Sunnycloud’s corner. “Over there.” She replied.

Another nest was placed beside Sunnycloud’s and in it where Lightningkit and Fogkit. Both toms were curled up beside each other, asleep.

“Are you going to play moss-ball with us?” Scarletkit piped up.

Owlspots tilted his head to one side. “How about Birchpaw and I teach you some battle and hunting techniques instead?” he suggested.

“Yeah!” The kits chorused excitedly.

Grinning, Birchpaw crouched down to face the kits. “How about the four of you try attacking me so that Owlspots can teach you how to improve your moves?” she asked.

The kits immediately tackled Birchpaw all at once, their force and combined weight causing the apprentice to topple over and onto the ground.

Birchpaw scrambled into a sitting position. “Well, that’s not exactly what I expected.” She said with a laugh.

Huntkit pushed herself off the ground to sit on Birchpaw’s back. “When I become a warrior, the other Clans will learn not to mess with us.” She announced.

Pebblekit lay on her stomach beside Birchpaw’s front paws. “I’ll make sure WindClan stays on their side of the moor.” She added.

Birchpaw purred. “I look forward to that day.”

Wolfkit lay on his back while gazing up at Owlspots who sat opposite of Birchpaw. “Well,” he said proudly. “I’m going to win every fight I participate in.”

Scarletkit yawned from her position beside Wolfkit. Laying her head on her golden paws, she tried to fight the sleep threatening to take over her. “How come Orangepetal was left in the middle of camp last night?” she asked sleepily.

Birchpaw immediately tensed and her eyes went blank.

“Birchpaw?” Huntkit asked worriedly, tugging at the apprentice’s ear lightly with her mouth.

Owlspot’s cleared his throat awkwardly before standing up. “Kits, I believe Birchpaw and I have to go.” He said. Walking towards Birchpaw, he gently took Huntkit off the apprentice’s back by gripping her scruff with his teeth and setting her on the ground. Afterwards, Owlspots placed his tail across Birchpaw’s shoulders. “Let’s go.” He murmured softly.

Birchpaw stood up and let Owlspots guide her away. She was vaguely aware of the kits calling out something but the same hollow feeling from the night before made it difficult to understand what they were saying.

Once outside, Owlspots stared at the she-cat, concern evident in his green eyes. “Birchpaw,” he murmured slowly. “They’re just kits. The concept of death is still foreign to them.”

The she-cat simply sighed in response. “I know.” She replied softly. “Scarletkit’s question just took me surprise.”

Owlspots managed a small smiled as he brushed his tail underneath Birchpaw’s chin. “Everything’s going to be alright.” He said, gazing at the apprentice comfortingly. “Okay?”

Birchpaw looked up at him before nodding. “Yeah.” She replied.

“Hey, Owlspots!” Someone called.

The two cats turned their heads to the source of the holler.

Sedgefire waved his tail back and forth, beckoning for Owlspots to come over. “Creekdrop assigned you on a dusk patrol with me and Ebonymoon.” He shouted.

“I’ll be right there.” Owlspots answered. He faced Birchpaw again. “Guess I’ll see you later then.” He said, giving her a grin before heading in Sedgefire’s direction.

Birchpaw’s gaze lingered on him for a few more heartbeats before she turned around and headed for the apprentices’ den. This time, she managed a smile while she walked.